we watched him drink his pain away a little at a time, but he never could get drunk enough to get her off his mind. until the night he put that bottle to his head and pulled the trigger, and finally drank away her memory.

(via bey0nd-my-thoughts)

  • High-School Teachers: You need to be professional when you go to college. High-School dress-code reflect what COLLEGE classes expect you to wear.
  • Actual College Student: I know this class is at 5:00 pm, but I'm wearing pajama pants and a tank top.
  • Actual College Professor: lol same.

lesbolution:

soloontherocks:

pandorantimelord:

One common misconception people have about bisexual people is that the abbreviation “bi” is short for “bisexual”, when really it stands for “Black Island”, the place where all bisexual people are born and raised by pirates. All bisexual people are pirates. Run

did you mean

image

birates

retroactivebakeries:

fuckdanielmaitland:

There are approximately 1,013,913 words in the English language but I could never string any of them together to explain how incredible I think you are.

As an english major I will do you the favor of constructing the phrases “sexual supernova,” “hella dick,” and “oh gosh.”